Grieving and Bereaving
Saturday, July 29, 2023 2:00 PM
It's been a rough week. My mom passed away in 2019 ( https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/fort-wayne-in/barbara-burt-8964527 ), aftetr a long battle with Alzheimers, and that was devastating enough. My dad passed away last Friday after a series of falls that left him vulnerabile and compromised. He's reunited with my mom now, which is a blessing, albeit a mixed one: https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/fort-wayne-in/john-burt-11380169 .
Watching your parents fade into the twilight zone is agony. It's inevitable — nobody avoids this — but it still hurts like hell. The saving grace, with my dad's passing; dozens of people, including family and friends and colleagues, have posted wonderful memories on the website, reminding us kids of what an impact our parents had on the Fort Wayne, Indiana, community in which they spent 6 decades.
When I arrived at my parents' condo last Saturday, the feeling was surreal and suffocating. The police who attended my dad's final fall had (understandably and respectfully) placed his shoes, cap, and glasses in a pile next to the garage door. Candidly, I could barely muster the strength to cross the threshold with that triumvirate of personal effects arrayed before the door.
We're all mortal. We all have to cope with the unavoidable loss of loved ones, especially our parents. I can only hope and pray that you all experience the same safety net of support that I and my siblings have experienced during this past week. Loss of family members is a fact of life. Nobody evades it. But having contemporaries of your parents reassure you that they were kind, and considerate, and appreciated...that means the world to any child.
My parents loved and gave back to their community. Nobody could ask for any more comforrting tribute. Thank you, Phil and Barb, for your honorable lives!